Saturday, February 18

Two happy moments today.  I can't decide which was happiest, so I'll report both.

The first was the general idea of T taking L to a Daddy-Daughter Dance.  The dressing up was fun (for L, not so much for T), and dinner out beforehand with L's friends and their dads was reportedly a big hit.  The dance, not so much, as there was very little "freestyle" dancing, but rather a ponderously slow caller who took eons on a muffled microphone to teach each simple little dance, all square-dance style.  T and L are both good dancers, given good dance music, and I had been looking forward to watching them bogie-wogie together! (I was helping in the kitchen with refreshments.)  So the dance was disappointing.

But the experience rates happy-moment status because it was wonderful to have T spend so much time with L's friends and their dads, just to participate in our world a little, to get a feel for their personalities and interactions, especially as the girls enter their true teenage years.  Generally T and I run in parallel social universes.  He's dragged me along enough that I have a feel for his people.  So it was good for him to interact with my people.  It made me happy to talk with him afterward about his impressions.

The other happy moment was spending time with R, only an hour and a half, after T and L left for dinner but before I had to go help with the dance.  I just really like that kid.  I really, really like him.  I boiled up some lobster ravioli I had bought at Sam's Club, and whipped up a quick white sauce to go over it.  Somehow I managed to make the ravioli explode in the boiling water, but it all tasted the same in the end, and the white sauce was yummy with it.  But mostly I just like spending time with R.

He is quiet.  A really understated personality.  You have to be quiet and listen carefully to get a feel for him.  You have to give him an opportunity to emerge, as bolder personalities easily relegate him to the background.  But when I have an opportunity to be alone with him, his sense of humor surfaces, and what he does have to say reveals an insightful and discerning and, especially, a kind spirit.

We wish his grades were better.  We can't seem to incite him to passion for anything right now, not for schoolwork or sports or cleaning his room!  And we're afraid for him as we watch the mediocre grades roll in every week, so our interaction with him can tend to be negative.  But boy, I don't want to roll over this guy.  He has a lot of awesome stuff going on on the inside.  I think we just have to be patient while he grows into himself and try to mitigate the damage by pushing him to stay on top of his schoolwork as much as we can without ruining our relationship with him.

Anyway, my hour and a half with R was another happy moment today.